merry xmas

merry xmas eve!

now is still moving house
so simple xmas dinner
but i tot it was the bestest so far

xmas dinner isnt abt the food
ok maybe sometimes is
many times is but not everytime
unless of cuz u are victor tan
cuz must have good good food
to sustain the sicklett trng wkload

but if u are not
(thank heavens)
then it is often not so much about the food
but perhaps for some it is hard to understand

anw this shldnt be here on xmas eve
but i just had to blog about it

ever smelt rotten eggs?

i had 2 eggs packed in a container a few days back
they were supposed to be my pre-trng food
but in the end
they became my stay on table for 4 days food
it is then by no coincidence
that a stale, fart smelling stench pervaded my room
at the end of that 4 days
for a moment
i though i had went another level
and attained the perma-fart
but it was not to be

why would i share such a story one might ask
haha because xmas ma, so sharing lor

merry xmas everybody

bird

today after taking a fast canal run
i sat there talking to quak and alan

i remembered talking about running
i mean, what else could we have talked abt

then from the corner of my eye
just behind quak
i saw it

it shot straight at us
its shadow silhouetted against the red track
moving at an inhuman pace
the black figure approached with menace
never touching the ground

flanking quak, it headed for my head
with a quick wave of my hand
i attempted to cast a spell on it
in hope that it would be repelled from my presence
to my horror, it was magic resistant

the abomination rested upon my head
i could feel its claws ramaging about my crown
in one swift motion of the hand
i applied my awesome force on the figure
promptly clearing the danger

sensing my superior strength
it fled at kenneth khing pace
victor tan distance

stupid bird
stay away from my head

links

ok updated the links
and for those of you
who dunno where the links are
very much shaming on yous

its on the right
under swim around
click on your father friends

tsk.

sing song move along

ooo new blogger
not using it yet though
still waiting for the transition to take place

transition?
that's been a recurring theme this year
transitions all over the place

transition from last minute mug like crazy O's
to whack all year round till ur guts fall out
then put them back and whack them out again IB

transition from captaining blackyellow tkk
to captaining blueyellow svm
to stepping down from captainship altogether

transition from 3 years of corrupt prefecthood
to normal, plain, ugly tie wearing student body

transition to the spanking new, overly tall,
overly cold, overly mechanic but superior feely
IB building

transition from one church to now not one, but two

transition from thong soon back to bedok, again

and transition from boyhood to manhood



the last one was just for fun to make the list longer
cuz u cant become twice as man if u're in my position
just isn't fair to the rest of mankind
anw

there are of course
stuff that didnt go through much change
like how i still pown all u acx punks at dota and polo
like polo today and dota which no one
NO ONE dared to play

my stunning good looks
that could not have gotten better cuz again
not fair

then there's also my faultless modesty
yes modesty u heard me right
that still remains intact
for all to see and be in awe of

but truly,
this year has been one of massive transitions,
rapid transitions.
2006 has been a Mass, Rapid, Transition year
shutup its 10/10

flood

today as i walked out of the house
i was startled like how a flood startles u
i witnessed a flood in flood-free singapore

once upon a time, outside my house
by the petrol station,
lived a drain
and in the drain,
lived pierce reservoir water
but one day (today)
a bad witch came and cast a spell over it
and from that day on
(till the end of today)
there was a drain
that lived in pierce reservoir water

it completely vanished
and the water was pouring in from the reservoir
so much so the cars on the other side of the road
broke down and trapped the drivers in them

then in the afternoon
radio say my hse there kena flood until waist high
my first concerns went out to my toe high comp
and my hip bone high ps2
fortunately i am still able to be typing here
and therefore i would like to thank
the senior admin
for their undying support
for which without none would have been possible
...
to god be the glory the best is yet to be

nice

jingle feet jingle feet
jingle all the way
oh what fun
it is to ride
on those 3:18s today, hey!

yes they have come
the terror that is the 3:18s
have come to haunt and curse
every member of acx and acjcxc
it is now truly the end

anw went out with kev today
go do xmas shopping
we talked many the manys
with 2 quotes of the day
revelation that rachel is cuter than him
and something else during dinner
that struck him a tad too late
some 4 or 5 years late
dating back to his puberty

what we talked about was...
extremely intruiging
smtg xide would give an arm, a leg and well,
a head to know and fathom
unfortunately
he will not be able to give up his anatomy this time round
cuz it is about nice and so i cannot divulge anything
but i shall gloat over the knowledge
that i know smtg he does not
and will find every opportunity to fan his curiosity
but never to reveal the secret
for the day the great truth is unveiled
will be the day that nice encounters
a rapid breakdown of his molecular and cellular structure
in other words he will be dead meat, veggie and fruit
but of course, xide will never know...

C is for cookie

C is for cookie! its good for you and me!

had this poem like last year ard this time
and i still have the same message this time rd
and its for one lost puppy wandering out in the cold sewers

without further a due
i bring to you my wonderful poem
crafted by my fantabulous mind
typed by my stupendous fingers
and made with a double portion of my unending love

but when it comes again you look back and see
those times you had before you came free
were the best you had the exchange was worth
your time your effort your very love
and despite the doom you might come to face
you look at it you tongue the taste
you wonder if it'll come to naught
you wonder if it's love you caught
then you decide why not i'll try again
think back and forth you'll see its worth the pain

emerge 2006

hu hua.
back from church camp.
camp was quite chee kah boom this time
is got the many many powsderful things

anw, as always, camp, in a few words...

horizontal moving seats... makhota.. extended services... indoor ice age.. abc123.. insufficient chocolate cake... 35 chocolate cakes... blindfold.. ashley... ciesta... spiderman.. encounter(ssss).. helez... ilovedanyeow .. GOD.

yup thats the gist of it.







anw just heard the song vic
posted on fastfasterfastest.
the lyrics looked good
but it sounds like a christmas carol gone wrong.
horriblys wrong.

standard chartered

On the 3rd of December, 2006, a group of fantabulous runners from the Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) International Baccalaureate World School cross-country team and the Anglo-Chinese Junior College cross-country team assembled in the Adelphi multi-storey carpark in the wee hours of the said morning. This gathering of the greats was to prepare for the Singapore Standard Chartered Marathon 2006.

However, as always, one member of the Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) International Baccalaureate World School cross-country team, more intimately known as acX, would always be inexplicably late. Previously, the record was held by Jonathan Lim with a record of 24 minutes. This year, Farhan Abdulrashid smashed the record with a new time of 33 minutes, establishing himself as the new come-late king, proving himself a worthy successor to the late Christopher Tay, man of hour deficiencies.

This time round however, acX had members taking part in different races. They were the halfies (21km) and the minis (10km). The halfies, also known as noobs, comprised of Prime Minister Kevin Ng, Deputy Prime Minister Low Xide and MOP (not Member Of Parliament) Kenneth Seet. The minis were basically, the rest, with the outstanding Kenneth Khing leading the charge.

Eventually, the noobs did well. Kevin Ng, despite shitting the heavens and the hells during the run, (note: NO TOILET PAPER) came in 1:27, ahead of the unsprintable Kenneth Seet coming in at 1:28. Low Xide kept rolling, and bounced in at 1:35, an extremely commendable effort.

The minis were fast. And that was all. Kenneth Khing was knocked unconsious by jealous kenyans at the starting line and fainted for a good 40 minutes. Once awake, he staggered the full 10km in 2mins, but the gap was too much to catch and he ended up getting powned.

This report would also like to cheer on Victor Tan, who is still on his 1874658873849841878942210059810048789120 km run till this date. For the unenlightened, this race distance is known as the sicklett run, but in Victor Tan terms would be known as a stroll from the toilet bowl to the sink.

splash

"here comes a big one"
the two half-crouch, anticipating the approachinbg juggernaut. it zips past them, causing shockwaves of water in its wake to come at the two. with precise judgement and stupendous athletism, they leap high into the air, expertly avoiding the treacherous waves.

but that was not to be

"wah shit big one big one lai liao lai liao"
the lumbering bus speeds towards them at break neck speed, parting the puddles and conjuring up waves of dirty water that swallowed pavements. as the waves approached, the pair hopped meekly into the air, trying in vain to keep dry amidst all the splashing and slushing, much to the amusement of the passengers in the passing buses.
"nb ccb kena already la"

and that was the story of how xide and i
tried to keep dry

trapped under the overhead train tracks
at bt timah,
the rain poured down as curtains on either side
soon, the roads began to flood with water and traffic
which inevitably led to vehicle-splash-man
xide and i cowered under the shelter of the bridge
jumping over every splash that came our way
xide cursed the living daylights out of the undead
while i, being immensely cultured,
kept veeerrrryyyy quiet. shhhh.

all was bleak
until xides maid,
in an act of splendid initiative
and armed with not one
but two umbrellas
found us in our miserable state

xide said it but i'll say it again
give the woman a pay rise man

kenneth seet

1 word -
OH MY SHIT

hmmm. 1... 2... 3...
err 3 words.
but the truth bears repeating -
OH MY SHIT

and oh my shit is right
why?
because kenneth seet has struck

i await with abated breath
to see seet's next move
then i will decide to strike or not

depending on the subject's course of action,
the next 6 entries in this blog
will become dedicated to hurling insults
at one very special kenneth seet

one word man seet -
delete

cross

i just read seet's blog
about his 2yr cross journey thus far

it stirred up something in me
which prompted me to blog this

he's right
it has been a long, 2 years since he came
you know ppl say when u're having fun,
time flies.
mmm.
k that didnt come out right.
ok la seet's not that bad la.
but still abit bad. just abit.

to make things clear,
apart from being yr5,
seet's a junior in everything cross.
in fact, he's a december baby
so he's still junior

he's been around for 2yrs
while the cabinet 5.
he's noob at sprinting, dota and soccer,
not to mention everything else we do
even in the long distance running department
cuz victor tan powns us all

but of course, ib teaches us to show both sides
for that, he does top our charts
for the "most likely member to have sex"

but being junior doesn't really matter at all
being part of the team does
it doesnt matter if you're a big piece or a small one
we all form the complete jigzaw that is acx
we all matter. and you all matter.

model

for every highly paid model
there is one that works for free
not for the lack of looks
but for the abundance of kindness

and that model is me
nah just kidding
or am i leading u to thinking that im kidding you?

it all started one day
when mr low, not his real name,
father of low xide,
also not his real name,
decided to diversify his income
by setting up a new handphone company
is that right?

anw, models were needed for advertising
but perhaps too costly for a budding company
therefore low xide was deployed
to scouse the land for willing
but able volunteers
and eventually chanced,
stupendously chanced
upon the gems that turned up
namely, and very importantly, me.
of course there were also
vish, caijing jingci and sam (is that it?)
to give the man credit,
i would include him as a gem as well

for every selected model
there is one unselected one
not for the lack of assignments
but for the abundance of desperation

and that came in the form
of (not their real names)
seet, victor, nice
and changming/audds/him/her/it/idunknow
and especially nice and audds
who came, sat for a few hours and went home
the other two just appeared and pigged
alot. ALOT.

newaez the meeting time was 0930
which was terribly early
considering we put make up only at around 11
and that the entire thing started -
the thing being an initial photoshoot
that unfolded into a full scale clip
that goes on i dunno where
by i dunno who
starting i dunno when -
at only 2pm. ONLY. nbccb

anw it was quite fun
apparently only for me
the rest didnt really enjoy it
esp for xide who looked really scared of the cam
i didnt have to do much tho
just sleep on the couch and look stupid

so anw, perhaps to the digust of my fellow crew
i will post the clip here when its up
so wait. patiencely.

model

for every highly paid model
there is one that works for free
not for the lack of looks
but for the abundance of kindness

and that model is me
nah just kidding
or am i leading u to thinking that im kidding you?

it all started one day
when mr low, not his real name,
father of low xide,
also not his real name,
decided to diversify his income
by setting up a new handphone company
is that right?

anw, models were needed for advertising
but perhaps too costly for a budding company
therefore low xide was deployed
to scouse the land for willing
but able volunteers
and eventually chanced,
stupendously chanced
upon the gems that turned up
namely, and very importantly, me.
of course there were also
vish, caijing jingci and sam (is that it?)
to give the man credit,
i would include him as a gem as well

for every selected model
there is one unselected one
not for the lack of assignments
but for the abundance of desperation

and that came in the form
of (not their real names)
seet, victor, nice
and changming/audds/him/her/it/idunknow
and especially nice and audds
who came, sat for a few hours and went home
the other two just appeared and pigged
alot. ALOT.

newaez the meeting time was 0930
which was terribly early
considering we put make up only at around 11
and that the entire thing started -
the thing being an initial photoshoot
that unfolded into a full scale clip
that goes on i dunno where
by i dunno who
starting i dunno when -
at only 2pm. ONLY. nbccb

anw it was quite fun
apparently only for me
the rest didnt really enjoy it
esp for xide who looked really scared of the cam
i didnt have to do much tho
just sleep on the couch and look stupid

so anw, perhaps to the digust of my fellow crew
i will post the clip here when its up
so wait. patiently.

blogging

i feel like blogging today but i dunno what to blog about. today there was training, lanning, and going home but i dun feel like blogging about any of them. they were eventful and mostly funful, but for some reason i cannot explain myself i dun feel like blogging about those. instead i would like to blog on something deeper, something that would boost my ego when ppl read and say wahhhh chims sia. however no such topic floats in my mind as of now and truth to be told, rarely ever does. perhaps that is my own deep thought. i think so deeply i realise it is useless to think deeply. hmmm. i'm contradicting myself, but that in itself is questionable and i think it qualifies as deep. perhaps i am a budding philosopher. if u dun think so then it could be due to the superficiality of your feeble mind that u cannot see the magnificence of my wonderful and splendid intellect. there. i am deep. deeper than the oceans that stretch themselves over the earth, deeper than the assholes that exist on total assholes on the surface of this planet. and that is really deep.

but alas, i am kidding myself. i possess no such genius. or so i am trying to lead u to think. a-hah. could it be a trap that i am laying that would cause you to underestimate me as did stalin's opponents that would result in my eventual rise to whatever power i am hoping to achieve. or it could be not.

i realise it has been a bore reading this post and i assure you it is not the end. some call me the epitomy of rubbish and boredom, yet some percieve it as words of wisdom that most cannot fathom. whatever the case, you are tired of reading this entry, and will be deterred because you see how long this entry is. as i typed the previous sentence you realise there was nothing beneath it, and displays my faultless prediction of the things that are to come. i will type alot.

there are many things i thread closely on in life. i believe in diffusion, i believe in the way nature works. i believe that to stop an egg from falling off the table to the floor, put the egg on the floor. i believe in balance, which is in effect, diffusion. and i also believe that i can change anything. mostly. some mostly. which brings me to the end of this entry.

by now you would have been diffused by this entry. some of me going into you. notice nothing is coming from you to me. therefore by my way of life, i am diffusing into you, and that can only mean i have a higher concentration of wisdom than u do. or rubbish. but i prefer to call my nonsense wisdom because no one said nonsense wasn't wisdom.

but now i have yet again contradicted myself. at the end of the paragraph before this, i said i was at the end of the entry. but i am not. and this shows my inability to predict future happenings. which contradicts myself. the following paragraph will illustrate the pattern that i am thinking along as i blog this entry.

this is a word. but that was a phrase. which... has turned into a sentence. but i have just reached a few lines. but hey look, i've typed a paragraph. and as i type, it just gets longer and longer and longer and longer. oh look it's a very long paragraph. perhaps it will soon qualify as an essay. and by the word of the prophesy this shall become a novel!

and this was not a novel. if u are not confused by this entry i applaud your will to remain sane. or to remain insane. ah-hah. i think this entry is very useful for tok. ibo should adopt this extract for textbook reference.

peoples

today i met many peoples while i was out
im blogging about it
cuz its the most ever in one day
here's how it started

i wash my hands at harbourfront mrt toilet
a familiar figure wearing toysrus shirt approaches
clement, who used to look more yandao greeted me

as i began to exit harbourfront mrt
a big, botak chimpanzee lumbered in my direction
i saw the look of terror return to tiezheng's eyes
as he chanced his eyes upon my wonderful splendour
strafing and keeping to the wall,
he hurled insults at me as he made his escape

exiting the floating bookshop at vivo
i spot alistair giving out fliers
he looks at me and for at least 6 seconds
ransacks his mind to remember who i was
before acknowledging my wonderful presence

with him, but formerly unnoticed
due to the covering tentage,
was the bane of all eyes bose

just seconds later as i descended from the stairs
a few of the council sat there,
staring at me, calling my name
at least 12 times before i realised and responded

next up the escalator at vivo
was charissa i-dun-come-for-training

sitting there and just being asked to do a survey
someone out of sight suddenly plopped beside me
strangely closely
i turned, and to the dazzle of my eyes
was darren chiew with his piercing complexion
that stunned my pupils
and placed in me a sudden desire to buy oakleys
for that, he was divinely punished
and was made to do the survey as well

finally sitting at queensway bus stop
my sweeping eyes caught sight of jordan tan,
who made me grateful for eyelids to cover one's sight.
his unusually inanimated self brought back memories
where classmates claimed he was quieter with girls around
hmmm. history class no girls meh?

today

this morning was a mad rush to school
i was late for history re-exam

amidst all the rushing,
i found time to despair, shaking my head
thinking "im history man"

at 0810, i was 10mins late
with tenacity like fart released after 20mins of holding in,
i ran like a cheetah after whatever it eats
towards the designated classroom
i pounced on the door handle like a rugby player towards the touchline
and pressed it down like a horny man on his lover's lalala

lo and behold

the classroom was dead empty
i was 3 hrs early
!@#$%^&*()_+{}|:"<<>
oh sorry cockroach ran across the keyboard
while i was holding down the shift button

fast forward to after re-exam

joined the ppl doing cas
to go beyond the borders of the school
to do the beyond borders cas project
a familiar knock on hdb door
and ask for newspaper and clothes project

we scoured the plains of dover rise
scaling stairs and lugging the collections
all the while with a smile on our jolly faces
listening to ian cheong talk in his dillusional world
with his own voice resonating in a land
where the little ian cheongs ran amock

disturbing imagery

anw block 1 was rather interesting
11-309 held a resident familiar to the acx family
our infant assistant coach, paulus
or balless as seet calls him
(although kenneth seet
also doubles up as cannot shit)
opened the door to low xide's knocks

also, there was this unbelievable stack
of newspapers lying beside the stairs
it had more volume than seet's body
k i was tempted to use victor tan
but i have to be honest,
the hdb wasnt made from newspaper
anw that pile of papers had us call in the holy relic
also known as the school trolley to carry it away

fast forward to after cas

seet nice and xide embarked on their respective missions
to snip off as much hair as they could from each others head
it all started with kevin cutting off ppls hair
sniggering all the while like the sneaky mut he is
seet and xide basically took revenge
and eventually they cut each other's hair in the cross fire

obvious blades of blunt hair stood out from the respective heads
and one unfortunate testicle
kenneth khing, with his unfaulted positioning
and manouevering abilities,
avoided all attempts by the 3 musketeers to cut his hair
the closest any of them came was a move by kenneth seet
who would have succeeded if not for the lack of sprinting practice
evident during training, chasing of bus 74 at holland v
and of course in the case of chasing after my perfect pantene hair
the times he did manage to get someone's hair,
was all due to his ability to blink strike cuz he's too short to spot

fast forward somemore

made an uneusual trip to nice's house
played with nice, xide and nice friends at nice house
had some nice plays, nice kicks and some nice balls going around
fun fun + fun

fast forward

khing sleeps

rewind

khing clicks on publish post
*click!*

xides house

its 6 plus now in the morning
and the handful of us are at xide's house
theres was potluck for dinner
at first there was an idiot who volunteered to bring apples
but in the end it turned out to be cookies
not so idiot but stupid nonetheless
i bet they were bought

anw we played games too
i for one played too much dota
its easy to play alot when u win
WIN YES WIN
just a few small losses here and there
not much la
2 to xide, 1 to kevin (with xide), 2 to horny
its a very respectable ratio and i'm proud of it

its 6am and my brains not functioning properly
which means now im at my most logically sound
which tells me that i should sleep now
cuz there's tuition to come soon. very soon.
even as i type this entry, tuition draws close.
i can feel it now.
it feels like something ppl never really put in words
i dun wan go tuition la
so heng one... one after the other
last times also liddat

im hungry. will pester xide now.
after. i. take. a. short. nap.

template change

tempy change tempy change
tot bloggy was due a set of new clothes
the last i change tempy was 20april05
which, is quite long ago

anw nice not
the drawing not very ideal
but its quite some effort
maybe i'll change it after a while
but for now, it'll stay this way
and its not random scribble k!

khingky barefoot

today i took sora out for a ride
since i havent talked abt sora since dunno when
i believe some of you dunno who sora is
sora's my bike
and yes my bike has a name

so anw i cycled from home to the zoo again
it took 15 mins but i wanted to cycle an hour
so i tot i would cycle for another 15mins then turning back homes
wah 1 hour cycling ah? quite tough right
i tot so oso. so i lowered the gears
then suddenly
...
...
...
(suspenseful silence)
...
...
..zzzz
zz....!
oh yes suddenly
the thingy that changes gears
suddenly came loose and kena the cogs
issit the deraileur? or is deraileur the change ring one
err anw the thingy that changes gears
suddenlys began to spin freely all over my bike
loci bike chain
the it got stuck and the chain slit its wires
basically the whole thing went crazy

so i stops under the flyover and tried to fix it for 40mins
my fingers got all black and sticky from the grease
but to no avail
i just didnt have the bike-tical knowledge to repair it
so i just locked it up

with my proneness to ankle injuries
and the instability of the cycling shoe
which resembles an inverse high heel shoe
i stripped my foot and with my helmet and shoes in hand,
i ran to the 138 bus stop

i had 2 $1 coins in my pocket
but as i ran and my foot rammed against the floor
albeit against a few painful stones,
the runner inside called out
it felt sooooo good
so i ran home
ok la got walk abit some places cannot run one
but it felt soooo good
until my foot started to hurt
so for the first time, i was quite happy to see the mandai crematorium

so much for today

today, i take a lesson from my sister's experience
as the saying goes
kiang tio ho, mai keh kiang
in case some of u tink thats latin or some cheem language
its hokkien
is meaning clever good enough liao, dun act clever

what is to be done

this entry is entirely dedicated
to reminding myself of school things to do during the holidays




enter soldier and officer
solider: sir!
officer: tok.
soldier: medea and gabbler have gotten away.
officer: fan out and search, put the ee squad on patrol with their dragonlances.
soldier: how about anna and ms julie?
officer: send CASper after them... make sure he stays invisible.
solder: yes sir.
officer: i want them history all over again... re-history...
solider: yes sir, but how about the press.
officer: say nothing. i want them history internally. assess your answers before you give them.
solider: yes sir.
officer: anything else?
soldier: no sir.
officer: very well.

exit officer

soldier ( walkietalkie ) : siddhartha! code purple!
sidd ( walkietalkie ) : pupil?
solider ( walkietalkie ) : purple! the colour purple!

chinese karaoke

on wednesday our sch had the chinese karaoke competition
for the first time, i was involved
i had tried in sec1-3 already and finally this year, i came through

eventually, i gave a sterling retro performance and came 2nd

it's been very special for me and im missing it,
though it lasted only over 3 days
all the rehearsal, the searching for that elusive vcd,
shopping for retro wear and eventually performing
all stood out for me in my life

i remember being so unprepared for the auditions
chionging to library to search and print the lyrics
to a song i just learnt the night before
then i sang it one octave lower for safety
and thereafter worrying over the exam period

i was really happy when i found i qualified
and from there i began serious preparation

my song dated back to the 40s and was damn tough to find
but eventually i came to this shop with this super zai uncle
who remembered every single song in his shop
and pulled out that disk
the song was sung by many ppl and i told myself anyone would do
just as long as i could get to sing it
but when the uncle pulled out the disk it was the singer i wanted
it was perfect

the first rehearsal involved standing on stage to sing
ok that was obvious but i want to have things here clear
so when i read this again everything would be very vivid
anw
singing on the stage was very much easier for some reason
maybe its just me
but for once i could control my vibrato properly
but i was off-beat and needed plenty of practise

rehearsal two was rather similar
still off-beat, but not as serious

then i spent the rest of that day looking for all the retro stuff at bugis
i had from the start a very clear picture of what i wanted to look like
tight, flowered, long sleeved shirt,
gold rimmed, BIG sunglasses
and a pair of leather shoes to go with my black pants
each time i found them, they were perfect and i was really excited
as i pasted them onto my body, i had another vision
and it was also very good
i grabbed my tube of gel and flattened my hair, side parting

then came wednesday
i was scheduled as the last singer, after justin and fuiyi
that meant two things :
i was to come on when ppl were getting restless
i had to sing after the 2 ppl i thought were very good

backstage, i cut a figure of tranquil, confidence and calm
offering support and coolness to the more jumpy ones
but inside, i was an ant on a hot wok
i was very scared

then the event kick started
it was perfect
when they flashed my picture,
they stopped short of showing the song name
it contributed to my element of surprise and well, humour
it was all perfect

then one by one, ppl went out to sing
that did nothing much to me, until fuiyi stepped out
the past 2 days of rehearsal have been a nightmare for her
she was always so afraid and always so on the brink of crying
she couldnt remember her words, nor could she follow the music
even though we assured her that her voice was very nice to hear,
which was true cuz it really gave me this fuzzy wuzzy warm feeling,
she was still apprehensive, timid
but then she stepped out to the unknown
and from her voice it was obvious -
she was being very brave
although i admit i preferred her singing when she was scared,
she showed 100% courage, something the audience could not see
her performance brought again a smile to my face
and my vision began to blur
but maybe that was cuz i wasnt wearing my glasses
but what it did do was calm me down. my confidence grew.

it was my turn. and from walking out retro-styled
to hitting the right notes and the right vibratoes,
it was all so perfect
i was enjoying myself
it was as if i stepped onto the track to race -
i was in my element
and so i sang

in the end though, i lost to justin
some people said i should've won
but i'm not so sure
after all, i always felt justin would win
it was disappointing, but i somehow felt happy, joyful

the thing is,
initially, it was 100% justin
but as i walked off that stage to the cheers of the crowd
knowing that everything had been perfect
i smiled, and said to myself
"i have a chance"
and that was enough for me

speak good singlish

as i was listen to mrbrown the speech good singrish pack
got stark realisation kena me
acherly is can setting up the singrish class for the foreigner
is got they all want to learn good singrish one like bongard
it will teaches them how not to sounding bad speaching singrish
like bongard

i belief the foreign ppl is sometimes want to integration into singapore
but the ang mor ness is the really the machiam hard to mai chup
so thus therefores it necessary for they to speeching good singrish

"as a matter in fact", is form of service cuz helping those in needing helps one
which meaning not hard to finds the teachers oso cuz can add inside the c.a.s.
i think is really feastabile ones, ist works!

economys

nbccb is now obsolete
move over!
i shall now demonstrate my grasp on the newest funkiest swears

you gnp gdp nnp ni!
expenditure income output you!

ah hah.
there we go.

wallet goose chase

ACT 1 SCENE 1 {set on an 855 bus}

Enter Khing and Qiuting

Khing : Oh woe be me, my purse hath been misplaced

Qiuting : Serious, art thou?

Khing : Serious I be, fair lady. `tis a terrible befalling bestowed

Qiuting : Mayhaps thou might so uncover thine purse in thy shouldered burden?

Khing : Nay, it has been as shadows in daylight. I must taketh my leave and return swiftly. I bid thee farewell.

Qiuting : Alas, thou woe be my woe, thus woe be us both. Let us proceed to unboard thy carriage.

Khing : Then so be it, however thee deems fit.

[exit

ACT 2 SCENE 2

Khing and Qiuting runs towards serene centre

Qiuting : Hurry! May haste save thy purse!

Khing : (aside) Haps that lad at the bus stop hath my purse?

(to lad) Honourable stranger, by fortune, hath thou a purse see?

Lad : Nay. I be alone - man, dead or leather.

Khing : Ay, great thanks to thee, we shall re-embark on our journey.

Qiuting : Where hence thou last mind thine purse?

Khing : Mine thoughts are as the morning mist - all is unclear. No matter, we shall seek further.

Qiuting : Purse, o purse! Where art thou? We seeketh till we reveal, so much i vow!

[exit

ACT 1 SCENE 2 {set: serene centre}

Enter Khing, Marcus and rest of FUEL group (shell)

Khing : Good Marcus! What hath thou found?

Marcus : As much as a fish finds fire in water, i fear.

Khing : Whence could it be?

Marcus : Whence did thou last see?

Khing : Thy purse must be here. Yet it eludeth us all. How much mystery hath been planted into this.

Marcus : `tis grit we must hold now. For all things shall come to pass through Christ strength. Thou shall run with no weariness and no faint in footsteps. Onward, brothers!

Khing : Wait, ho! Thy memories floodeth back! O great fool, come now!

Marcus : Where now cow of brown?

Khing : `tis madness, this thought of mine. Yet mayhaps my purse be as McDonald refuse!

Marcus : What treachery is this? `tis far from sanity! Look, ho, lunar hath risen too mightily!

Khing : Nay! We shall proceed. This unholy grave shall we defile!

Marcus : A madman's wish but none shall i turn away. A favour too much to not risk astray!

[exit

ACT 2 SCENE 1 {set: Serence McDonalds rubbish bin}

Enter Khing, Qiuting, Marcus and rest of SHELL

Felix : Thy repulsive cestpool i shall uncover, there on thou be devoured.

Khing : `tis enough, i offer thee gratitude.

Felix uncovers bin

Khing : My purse i see! Oh great joy be me. Yet melancholy shall reek, as do my purse before me.

[exit

Wallet Goose Chase

-On the 855 yellow bus

Khing : Oei sia la. Wallet boh ke. Must be kah lao somewhere.

Qiuting: Wah jia lat. Liddat how. Is it in your bag?

Khing : No not there. I next stop get off. Bye bye.

Qiuting : I get off wif you la.

Khing : Ok la.

-Running back to serene centre

Qiuting : Faster la later wallet really gone.

Khing : (thinking) wah maybe that guai lan guy sitting at the bus stop kope my wallet

(to guy) aye fren got see wallet here not.

Guy : Err dun haf.

Khing : Orh ok thanks.

Qiuting : You remember where you last saw it not.

Khing : Cannot sia my mind bong cha cha.

-Serene Centre

Khing : Marcus! How?

Marcus : Don't have lei. We search already. Then also got ask the receptionist there.

Khing : Wah lau where could it be.

Marcus : Must be around here somewhere la.

Khing : Oh wait. I think I know where. Maybe i throw with my mcdonald meal.

-McDonald rubbish bin

Felix : Khing i take out the bin for you. After that you own your own ah.

Khing : Can can.

(felix pulls out bin)

Khing : Oh my son. It's here.

madman's blog

it's here. it's in the room.
it's in the corner. it's right here with me.
the moon illuminates it for me
yet why cant they see it?

but no, it's out there
it's out to get me.
it's an entire nation after me
it's the great empire of the exami
yes... it's the exami nation.
the moonlight is being shrouded by ominous clouds
no... the moon... no...

it was a terrible day.
all day i had spent locked up in that prison
the prison that had cost 11.8million bucks to make
all that money just to lock me in.
no... they can't keep me... no.

everywhere my jail mates walked.
there was no escape...
we were all identified in our jail uniforms
those hideous, gruesome uniforms...
spawned from a warped concept
a concept that had jaws that dripped blood
our blood.. no... leave me alone

i still see it now
the wardens' bloodied jaws gaped maliciously
i see it... i see it...
they claw at us,
with each wound inflicted burdening us yet again
especially now... since the examis are coming
they're coming.
moon oh moon. where art thou?
the lunar be my light.
the lunar be my might.
the examis are coming.
i know.
my in mates know. i can see it in their eyes.
daily they pick up their weapons... prepping for war.
the examis are coming.

the moon is out again.
i must bask in its brilliance again.
moon oh moon.

new bag

my trusty old deuter bag i bought at chiangmai in sec3
spoilt just a few days back
the zip got zip like never zip the zip liddat
zip already got hole one
den all my barang barang kah lau from the side all come out

so these few days i use my white deuter bag
dating p5.
it was too small la
for the amount of work i have to bring home
it was buldging awkwardly

and thus today
i made a trip down to bugis street
scouring the crowded maze that shifted as time passed
i covered every inch of bugis street
all the while listening to extremely beng/lian songs
like the hokkien version of lau shu ai da mi

finally i bought my bag
pity they dun produce white backpacks again
but anw
i bought this really really big red bag
and i put my old bag, my plastic bag of wet clothes and my shoes in it
much space there was left
red bag, upsize pls
you could put a desktop comp into the bag sia
i saw myself in some reflection
and i looked like some primary skl kid
lugging this ginormous bag around
acherly
can fit a primary skl kid inside oso...
hmmm

featherless wings

blossomed wings arched in brilliant light
goresome sight of one grand flight
three wings one pair
zero feathers none the nightmare

everything comes at once, nothing can be seen
let me know in advance, anything so keen

withered wings wet with wild wind
pierced petals pruning, pinned
i'm not out of my mind
but there is something that i've yet to find

create, animate and evolve
excavate, advocate and dissolve
what am i missing where have i not gone
when will i be finding just what all went wrong?

eyes wide open

the other day i had a very peculiar experience
it was the first time i had slept with my eyes open
i've been able to sleep partially while standing so far
but this was really eye wide open sleep, albeit light
indeed, it was an eye opener

its happen during one economy crass

we were doing market failure i tink
something that had calculations one
oh yes gdp n gnp
wells prior to econs
i had an ultra long his story class
which was ultra sapping
so ultra, man

so anw
i was engaged in a fiercesome battle with the Z monster
zzzzz...
it was mightily imba
zzzzz...
i was getting owned, pawned and whatever u can think of
zzzzz...
yet i stood ok sat in the face of adversity and persevered
zzzzz...
but soon it was gg
zzzzz...
the Z monster had just bought the skadi and had frost attacks
ok la it was the air con but anw it made it very sleep conducive
zzzzz...
and thus i succumbed, though i still refused to close my eyes

there i was, resting my head against the back of my chair
tucked snugly in my jacket
sleeping with eyes wide open

i could see everything, but they didnt register into my mind
the next thing i knew, i saw bernard low walking towards me
but it was still not registering. the register had problems
then he tapped me on the shoulder
and i woke up with a start
now i know... my start button is on my shoulder
so anw i realised he had finished gdp and gnp oreddy
but all i noticed was him walking towards me
was quite cool i guess
about 16 degrees to be precise
someone should calm down the air con

econs

nbccb...
somebody stole my econs textbook
the verys expensiving economy textbook

as i left for math class
the said economics textbook
was laid on my extremely messy desk

and during that lesson my class was unful
and unlocked

when i returned
someone had performed a disappearing act on it
but had conveniently ran out of mana
to perform it on melvin's ipod
which was lying on his neat and tidy table
which was right beside mine
this brings me to the conclusion that a gep did it
and that the quantity supplied of the book is very low
which is the reason why the price is so freaking high

well since im on the topic of econs
i shall convey some of my thoughts here economically
pls note that all concepts mentioned
are fictional and should not be used to aid one in an examination situation
and that all comments are to be taken with a pinch of salt (or not)





Kenneth Khing
5.7 Ruth
Economics Internal Assessment
Market Structure
Tuesday, August 22, 2006

GIRLS IN ACS(INDEPENDENT)IBWS

In this extract, the firms and their product, as bizzare as this sounds, are the girls and the consumers are the boys, restricted to only within the Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) International Baccaulaurette World School.

The market structure of this particular industry is interesting as it is extremely ambiguos. In this essay, I will investigate this market structure and will provide, if any, suggestions to improve this industry.

The firms in this industry are small in sizes (not literally...) and come in relatively small numbers as compared to the amount of consumers. This inevitably means that there is a shortage of supply, which is the quantity of product a firm is willing to supply at any one time. This causes the supply curve to shift to the left as illustrated in the non-existant diagram that i cannot be bothered to draw. However there is not a high increase in price because the demand is highly price inelastic, which is the percentage change of demand due to a percentage change in price, as depicted by the fairly gentle gradient of the demand curve. Simply put, consumers are not willing to pay a very much higher price, which in this case is the willingness of the boys, to aquire these goods. This is due to the fact that there is an abundance of substitutes that can be acquired by consumers elsewhere. Also, the price inelasticity of the demand curve indicates that the goods produced are inferior goods and demand for these goods would fall as income, in this case ability to acquire substitues, of consumers increase. However to some consumers, there are a few dominant firms in the market as well, albeit very subjective.

Secondly, we see that barriers to entry are moderate. It is easy for firms to enter (or become) the industry. Certainly, there is no legal barrier to entry. Advertising is evident in the industry, but judging from the fall in demand, is not informative but rather persuasive and is yielding in fact, negative results. This is a strange phenomenon which sees not brand loyalty but brand hate surfacing in the midst of these advertisings. However the vast amount of capital required to purchase equipment (books), essential packaging (uniform) and government taxes (project 120) is perhaps a form of barrier to entry.

Thirdly, there is near perfect information. Information is spread rapidly across the market, and consumers quickly know when a product is available or not. This information also allows for firms to know what competing firms are doing. However, despite easy access to information, there is still the natural incentive for producers to invest in R&D (Research And Development) such as make up, pads and *ahem* enhancements. There is ability to invest in R&D as well, seeing how most firms are able to afford capital-intensive equipments, essential packagings and governments taxes.

Products shift invarialby and fluctuatingly between homogenous and differentiated. Homogenous because consumers cannot bear to look at many producers, which is emphasized further by the unflattering essential packaging. Products are also differentiated because, as mentioned earlier, there are few dominant firms in the market that produce unique goods. Indeed, even some homogenous producers produce unique goods, though they are often ignored and shunned.

Formal collusion is present in the market in terms of information. The rapid transfer of information between firms that occurs indefinitely allows firms to be aware of demand of the consumers. With this, producers are able to practise price discrimination, which is the disparity in price offered to a consumer under similar circumstances where the product would normally be priced at. Producers are able to raise the price to play hard to get or even lower it if these firms are in desperate need for revenue to recoup losses from their long-standing sub-normal profits. Dominant firms could even engage in 2nd degree price discrimination, which basically is the lowering of prices due to a purchase in bulk.

Therefore as can be seen, this market is not definable by conventional market structures. Instead, it is a market of its own and requires many assumptions to be made to assess this industry and many factors have to be taken technically. And especially technically. Hence, it shall be called technicpoly.

Currently, there are few feasible solutions to technicpoly but one such Welvin Mong has suggested to shape supply by murdering firms. Perhaps one could cause market failure in smaller firms and leave the dominant firms avaiable.

Word Count: TOO LAZY

on the double

i have finally attained the double
the double ankle sprain
but lady luck and uncle hengness has watched over me
thus i still walk the land
mesmerizing girls with my enchanted good looks
bringing peace wherever i go
and making the world a better place

anw
as xide pointed out
i now have more sprains than birthdays
less birthdays than sprains
i feel my ankles have matured way beyond myself
and thus i will make a concerted effort from now on
to seek advice and help from them whenever the need arises
i will place my ears to my ankle bone during exams
and they shall speak in place of my lips
all hail the wise ankles

i think by the time i reach twenty
i would have sprained the ankle sleeping
i would dream of wrestling in the wwe
and i will be about to deliever my special move -
the crown jewel,
to my arch nemesis, kurt angle
but then he reacts swifty and sweeps at my feet
then grabbing my ankle, he twists it
at this point i would flip in bed
and twist my ankle the wrong way

i think i have no equal in ankle spraining
my time frame to sprain ratio should be a world record
but fear not, i will not despair
i will still continue to bring unrivalled joy into your lives
albeit on crutches

acsi cross-country

On the 4th of August 2006, Friday, at approximately 3.45pm, the race for the Open category of the Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) International Baccalaurette World School Annual Cross-Country Championships commenced.

With a rapid change of pace and switching of fleet feet, Kenneth Khing exploded off the starting line and raced to a great start. Realising that a sustained effort of equal velocity would imbalance and upset the competition, he slowed down to a walk. After many a while, Kevin Ng, huffing and puffing at the sheer pace of Khing, gradually caught up and tried to pull away. At this, Khing cantered into a jog, to keep up with the sprinting Ng.

One kilometer into the race, Khing noticed that his hair was out of place. He jogged over to the pond to have a look at his reflection and unhurriedly sculpted his mane, making sure that every strand of hair was in place. He then proceeded on with the race and caught Ng a good 646.8m within 4 minutes. Bored, Khing proceeded to run circles around the tiring and panting Ng.

"Thud, thud, thud". The sound of shoes pounding upon Mother Earth filled the forest, killing the silence. Then Khing heard another sound. He spun around and began to run backwards. Empty. Ng was the only person in sight, struggling to keep the blistering pace. The sound came again. It sounded like the crunching of bones. From the corner of his eye, Khing spotted the felling of a few thin willow trees. Through the debris, he picked out a monster measuring 7 inches by 6 feet by 6 feet, with 7 inches being the height. It was rummaging through the sparse vegetation, wielding a gleaming parang and hacking away at the greenery for it to pass. It was Victor Tan. On a motorcycle, no less, to match the unequalled speed of Khing. Then Khing was hit by a stark realisation. Ng had bribed Tan to weed out the competition.

Caught by surprise, Tan managed to plant the parang deep into Khing's heavily muscled thighs, but the great centrifugal force conjured up by Khing's fast rotating legs caused the parang to wriggle free and it spun out of control and whistled through the air, towards Tan. It caught Tan between the legs and he began to scream like a girl. Green lipids flowed out from between Tan's legs as he laid on the path, unconsious.

The damage, however, had been done. Khing could not continue the race on his feet. Thus he fell to the ground, and started to roll. But it was not to be. Khing was not accustomed to maneuvering his entire self along the ground. Although he still kept stride with Ng, he eventually fatigued and had to stop. Several long, long moments later, Low Xide and Kenneth Seet caught up. With sheer determination and grit, Khing started to crawl. Shaking off the pain that haunted his legs, he pulled himself forward with his arms, all the while taking up the entire running path with his bulging biceps. Eventually, he ousted Low and Seet to the finish, but it was not enough for gold. Sneakiness had won the day.

is liddat one ma

to quote the straits times,
"We do not need to use bombastic words
to speak good standard English"
if my guess is right
the target audience of that sentence
was very likely aimed at those
who dunno what the word bombastic means
why not just use the word "big" instead?

to quote the paper again,
"The principal of Anglo-Chinese School (Independent) says:
'We are constantly seeking more creative methods
to teach our students, and we invite them to express their views,
excercise their initiative and take part in a variety of activities
outside class"
HMMM.
eh. i didnt say anything ah.
i just said HMMM.
i think HMMM shouldnt cause me to be thankful for not being expelled.
HMMM.
HMMMMM...

given a choice
given a voice
given a say
given my way
i would turn the cogs back
i would paint the school black

just so i may
this very day
cause them to see
what happened to me
indifference, apathy
i have learnt as much

care not or rebel
cannot a repel
i toss the sands
i wash my hands

sian

recently a few i know have been infected
by mrbrown's new hit single : sian
the lyrics are really qool
but the music is hypnothysingly sian
quite gd tho.


im gonna be a music junkie
and just post the lyrics here

sian-themrbrownshow

i tried to cook, but got burn by frying pan

mrt no "toot toot toot" nearly kena my hand

all the girls that i know, say only see me as friend

nabei lift at my block,just break down again

[chorus]

i wake up in the morning and i dunno who i am

i am sian... sian

i'm not happy i'm not sad, but i sure know what i am

i am sian... sian

i'm just walking down the street, and i dunno what to eat

i am sian... sian

every second every minute every hour everyday im sian

sian... how did i get so sian

got job interview, but got hole in my pants

go see show but the fella infront damn tall can

my pc kena virus and the toilet flush spoil

my brand new handphone kena drop in cooking oil

[chrous]

i...i'm so frus (x4)

sunny in the morning and its rainy in the night

i'm sian...

the weather cannot change and neither can my life

i'm sian...

i am talking to myself cuz there's really no one else

i'm sian...

i may think i have a choice but i really have no voice

i'm sian... how did i get so sian

indeed there is manys a thing to be sians about

what with grades not being fierce enough

sports not being golden enough

money no enough

or even third leg no long enough

there are so much to be sian about

but so long as there is a single zit of fun

in the teenage face of sianness,

there will be pulses, no, pus-es of joy

erupting forth and spreading like wildfire

across all complexion that is sian,

birthing yet more pimples of excitement

so i urgeth thee

to never despair at sianness

for that is tatamount to using

the fashwash of boredom

that will resulteth in a smooth, unvarying face of sian.

for there will always be someone with worse grades

overweight victors

poor xides

and short-legged seets around

who have more a reason to be sian

so remember

for as long as there is a pinch of shit

lying in the rectum of the anti-joy,

there will always be the pleasant fart of fun

that will pervade the ass

and give rise to stinking thrill

like how as long as there is a single fish of pleasure

in the ocean of sianness,

there will always be...

erm. u get the idea.

be happy =)

IBDP

after many months in the
Anglo-ChineseSchool(Independent)InternationalBaccalauretteWorldSchool
i have come to see the many ugly sides of it
there are already a number of drop outs
some go to poly
some stop studying entirely
and there are many more such cases waiting to happen

there are many like i,
or rather 3
but still alot cuz it takes most of my sch social life
(i is nots a sociallite)
that have half a mind
(no not meanings we is half as crever)
to jump ship to acjc
but cannor
ok not cannot but no ready
i just had to put the cannor there

the way i see it
it has to do with the failure
to recognise that IB is an own-time curriculumn
at least i feel it is
if given insufficient own-time, we wld get owned
pretty badly
what with studying,
reading of extra material (highly recommended by teachers),
CAS, EE
and the more eat energy (jia lat) of all, IAs
on a regular 1640 day,
any one would take up all the time that day
not forgetting also that we all take 6 subjects
and at least one CCA
what happened to emulating the 36point avr IB sch in malaysia?
they have 5 hours sch days and wednesdays totally off

people reading people doing
children work you hear them crying
they cant practice what you preach
still gotta turn the other cheek
father father father help us
give us some guidiance from Above
cuz ppl got me got me questioning
where is the time?

and not to mention
the entire image malfuntion
though calls for a new tie were heard
they were perhaps
juuuussssstttt perhaps
not heard rightly
which resulted in... bleaurgh
length of hair, which has no practical use
is to me, too stringent
and with these two points, i present my argument
if the tie is to be forgiven because looks dun matter
den long hair is just outward and dun matter
but if image matters so much
den get rid of the tie

of course there is so much more i can say
but i'd rather save it for another day
when i can have my way
and proclaim to a wider audience and shout ni nabei

this is not a disgruntled voice
nor an outraged individual
it is a disgruntled, outraged, wildly peeved individual with a timebomb for a voice

track nats

yesterday was track&field finals
which is often called track finals
i feel field shld b given due credit
afterall, the recent(and not so recent)championships
have shown that a good field of field athletes
can give victory in overall standings

anw
i lent my talents to the 4x400 team ytd
and my legs were used for the 2nd leg of the race
which happens to be my favourite leg
cuz other schools usually have their slowest leg for 2nd leg
and therefore my leg would be faster than most legs
which was very evident ytd
cuz i had an easy time catching
ok i was doing a fast fast time
but if it wasnt for being 2nd leg
i wouldnt really have caught them i guess

but really it was quite a simple job
in fact
i had so much to think abt instead of the race.
i had this burning urge igniting within me
to say hello to de cruz as i passed him
however i tot that wld make me very guo pei
so i just put more space between us
and left him in my glorious sweat trail
i guess thats friendlier and more amicable

the more significant event today however
was the track dinner
acjc's track dinner
sorry
acjc's track&field's dinner

err no not cuz of the food and stuffs
but potentially the last of gatherings
with the acjc crossers
with the prospect of a leaving batch and coach
and a separate training regime
it could be the last time we came together
ok so we didnt mix much at dinner either
but heck the idea is there

oh btw
cross in 9 months
the bell will ring for he who believes

deferment and ankle sprain

somewhere in early june
and thats a big somewhere
because i dunno when
i recieved a letter from the army
go online and tell us you're studying, it said
if u don, ITS THE END
in caps, no less.
ITS THE END

fast forward to today
i havent applied for deferment
which was due 26/6
so what is ITS THE END?
i have to go for army medical check up 2ml
and then shave botak and be part of the nation's defence force
though i may qualify as protector of earth
i dont really want to go NS just yet

i can hear it now...

kenneto is angry
becos he want to disrup
to study diproma in internasserner bakkalawlet
but cannor...

so what did i do about ITS THE END?
i had to call during recess
in essence the call was like
hi i do not want to be in the army yet
and so say we all
postpone the thing

in another separate incident
i was talking to chan chee wei

"so how did u do for your races?"
"uh. 2nd for 800"
"congratulations!..."
"thank you"
then like how an unexpected sentence stuns you unexpectantly
he continued his sentence that stunned me unexpectedly
"...at least you didnt sprain your ankle"

there i stood, hand half out-reached, stunned
memories of that fateful sprain flashed past me
i saw myself there again
crossing the line... raising my finger to heaven in jubilation
taking that infamous tumble as i did
and sprained thy ankle
before raising my finger to heaven again... in half jubilation

"err. i sprained it after i crossed the line"

awkward silence. dead silence. brooding silence.
lulling silence. thinking silence. whatever silence,
this silence of ours.

"err. within boundaries la. sprain after race not so bad"

i have been scarred
this picture, this motion picture no less
will be with me all my life
haunting me in my sleep
shadowing me in my wake
eating at me, slowly, silently
and until i sprain my ankles no longer
i will find no rest...
i will find no rest...
i will find no rest...
its the ends la.

that 800m

a bad race it was a bad race to see
2.09 is good for sec2 or even 3
but not for poor year 5 me

it was a story of wait and run
both saravan and i waited
but we never ran
cuz no one came to lead the pack
so the race just came down to the last 100m
where he had a 2 second head start

but it was just another race
just another track race
until of course, i crossed the finish

i broke past the white line
and i raised my hand to God
your glory oh father was what i said
"well done my child
now here's an ankle sprain"
in that state of worship
my spike nails chipped the rubbery track
and the right ankle twisted with spectacular finesse
qik qak
ankle sprains
but not to be deterred
i raised my hand again

or as seet put it to xide through the phone,
"oh khing got 2nd for his 800"
"after he crossed the line he raised his hand in jubilation"
"..."
"then he tripped and sprained his ankle"

kenneto is angry
because, he wan to disrup
to study scorership in sprain ankle
but cannor...

that 800m

a bad race it was a bad race to see
2.09 is good for sec2 or even 3
but not for poor year 5 me

it was a story of wait and run
both saravan and i waited
but we never ran
cuz no one came to lead the pack
so the race just came down to the last 100m
where he had a 2 second head start

but it was just another race
just another track race
until of course, i crossed the finish

i broke past the white line
and i raised my hand to God
your glory oh father was what i said
"well done my child
now here's an ankle sprain"
in that state of worship
my spike nails chipped the rubbery track
and the right ankle twisted with spectacular finesse
qik qak
ankle sprains
but not to be deterred
i raised my hand again

or as seet put it to xide through the phone,
"oh khing got 2nd for his 800"
"after he crossed the line he raised his hand in jubilation"
"..."
"then he tripped and sprained his ankle"

kenneto is angry
because, he wan to disrup
to study scorership in sprain ankle
but cannor...

dear blogger

Dear Master,

It's been 3 long years since we started off and we've never looked back since. I can still vividly remember all the times we've had and all your life you shared. Be it the jokes, the times or even the rants - they're all so precious to me. Your impeccable blogging style and marvelous sense of humour have helped matters much, too. I beam with joy whenever you blog on me. It is as a masterstroke of paint on an empty canvas that just brings out the life in the work. It is no wonder that people regard this blog so highly and yes, the readers have been growing. Having said that, perhaps it would be good to work on the packaging, no? I mean, you've made me get noticed and the fact stands that more people turn up to read me. How about it? I haven't had my clothes changed in a while and they're wet and dirty with all the clicking and scrolling. Please?

-Your Blog

beckoning

one valiant cry. a single soul.
one of passion. one gaping hole.

a black hole an empty void
unfulfilling everlasting
on my red do avoid
the general a-mending

i can what i am
i am whenever when
i am my only man

so take the reins but i will reign
out of view and out of range
till the moment when gushes of pain
engulf will i exchange

it is something i will defend
the day will come my dearest friend
when i will eye you for one second
and say sorry but it's the end

gone

the kevin picture has been removed prematurely
this is due to a ruptured disk which fragmented into the spinal collumn of kenneth khing due to a violent outrage by kevin ng. further death threats from the ever nice nice has forced the secretary to do the unimaginable - remove the photo. kevin ng has described the photo as an outrage of modesty which has impaired his ability to speak or even look or get looked at by people. it is a serious case of mental illness known as the oh-my-blue-son-thats-me-pia. victims of this deadly disease will cease to be fertile and will display uncharacteristic bursts of anger, yet looking calm at the same time. the effect of kevin ng's actions however has not come to being fully blown yet because he is lagging and has yet to react.
we regret any inconvenience caused to anyone other than kevin ng.

so nice

for those who still do not know
what the upheaval at the tagboard is abt
go to the cross blog
which is marked 'acx' on the right
haha kevin is going to kill me for this
but yes a picture of 14 year old nice is there
im supposed to take it down after a week
so EVERYBODY GO THERE BEFORE I TAKE IT DOWN

it was taken during nats 2003
and as can be seen from the picture
nice was saying HI to the camera
but to this date he denies it
claiming he was trying to block the cam
during nats? concentrate man kevin

whatever
the picture is the hottest craze
since the simon bongard cross country video
dated april 2003
u will notice that kevin hasnt changed much
the hair is still puffy wuffy
but there kevin is shorter than me
a far cry from the towering 178cm goondu storming abt now
and there is utterly no sign of armpit hair
i repeat : ZERO ARMPIT HAIR
haha its the end for me
kevin ng will roast me
but that would mean no one to take the pic down
so either way things wun go his way
its the end la nice

where will you be?

victor wants to be a chef
xide doesnt know what he wants to be
and kevin haha might continue family business
drive magic school bus

where will i want to be?

i want to create.
no not baby making.
i mean like works, art,
or more so, talent.
perhaps a teacher
but what i really want to be
is to be a coach

haha we can work together right
i coach the kids
kevin drives them to the restraunt
and victor cooks up some super nutritious meal
and xide... takes the orders or something

but my mom doesnt want me to be a coach

i am to study as well as i can
be a professional
hopefully hold a government job
or be the government itself
so she will have extra layers of face.
i can see it now:
'khing of parliament'
but i dont want
it's tiring being king of everything
king of looks
king of character
king of speed
king of humility

but of course
my moms face is way way more important
and even though i feel im not born to study
my mom thinks so because fortune telling says so
well i guess that is more reliable than what i feel, no?
im meant to be a scholar

i mean, u cant be successful without papers right?
my mom never passed Os
and shes only earning over 10k a month
could have been so so so much more
she could have bought bungalows
and then sell to karang guni for fun what

but dont get me wrong
i love my mom
but i hate some things she does
i dun use hate often
so the effect is there when i do
but its the deed. not the person.
i know she wants what is important for me
but what about things that are important to me?
have they no bearing at all?
i feel im living my life in her dreams
dun wan lei
sibei jia lat

i move my legs

my wings have spread

none i spared

grace in my step

in all i dared

this pinnacle that i have reached

a fortress that could not be breached

my reign was tall

my era stitched

then there began my fall

a crippled mind, one wretched wreck

i did stand tall

yet i was to crack

but wait along you will come to see

a champion i am, a champion to be

for if it is meant to be

it is up to me

i blogged

: khing you cheat me! said you were blogging. what rubbish.. it's still the same -hols are ending- entry. EEEEEE

the fact is i did blog
i just didnt want to post it
content wasnt good enough

i find this occuring more frequently
as in blog blog blog
look at the thing and den log off
have to keep up high standards you see
much is expected from one such as i
but it really is hard to keep
thus the fall in number of posts recently

as i've said beforeim becoming more and more conscious
of what ppl think of me
budden think think bit bit more
sometimes oso not so
sometimes is really dun wan face one
so when am i who?
who am i when?
who am i where?
and how am i who?

its been a bad post
but this time
im posting this

hols are ending

thy dusk of hols cometh
but homework i toucheth not
big trouble i have plungeth into
yet no shit i giveth

thy day will cometh
when homework is due
when i will curse my cursed procrastination
and mutter tamade

acherly i think most of u oso right
before hols say sure study sure work
den now neh study neh work
come here read the best blog in the world
if however u did do work and did study
u... alien la
but of course alien oso cannot resist reading my blog
that is understandable

now ish 4 weeks to track nats
limpei both leg is sibei boh lat
recently take tau huay break from trng
cuz like kena burn out like malboro liddats
but tomorrow will go for move-leg-faster-game
get one trng den race during weekend

anw turbo phantoms are here
not say sibei solid or steady pom pi pi
apart from being lighter than my versus
they're ntg much
think think oso quite du lan
but anw versus no size for me
so boh bian oso must get versus
at least not as cham as zul
got a pair of used lite-nings

so there
i blogged
and its getting late
if i dun slp now
i'll oversleep again.
yes again.

it's been a long time

whooaa
haven't blogged for the longest of times
partly cuz of the super busy schedules
and partly cuz of the lijiang entry
couldn't bear to blog over it

so far nothing much has happened
lots of school
lots of ponning school
shit loads of work
big walk (where ac owned, thank you)
ok amounts of training
ok amounts of dota (nicholas pawns you)
going out with my girl
waiting for my turbo phantom (right)
mr brown-ing =)
COMPILING CROSS PHOTOTS (yes jon im on it)
and did i mention shit loads of work?



if i remember correctly
thats just about all thats happened since i last blogged
which is fine cuz i need to take as little things as i can now

but for now im tired of blogging.

lijiang

"back from lijiang everybody. really unforgettable experience..but just in case...the trip... in a few words..."

would be the first 4 lines in kev's blog if he still blogged i guess. even till today its still his second visible entry dating 20january04.

i guess i'll go with the few words... but i'll do some elaboration too.

(ahem!).. scandals... bridge... carbines... shitting on hills... lepak... nice... china eastern... shuhe town... dayan town... horse piss... kfc... naxi night... 3 little pigs... noobie/nu bi... great kids... vase sized buns... damn good food... jin zhuang.. teaching... soccer... soccer.... soccer.. bhangra... tearful goodbyes.. HONG HE... ruins(toilets)... ac milan... stone skipping.. tadpoles... tiger leaping... snow mountain... cable cars... oxygen.. chairlift... condom... lame jokes... acting insane.. direct translations.. shoot shag marry.. everyone.

ilovelijiang.

now that's over, here's the expansion.

the transition from sg to china was basically bridge and sleep
oh yes and one mens health as well

sunrise from the plane

clouds!

shui bian ice cream

decided to have an ice cream at kunming airport. this was direct translation number 1 and was an example of how mut the chinese cld be. haha. it's like you ask someone what they want to eat and they say "shui bian" and you buy them the ice cream.

lijiang's scenery was just that damn good.we stepped out of what seemed to be the airport which was like one room and one conveyor belt?heh den bam it hit us like how a range of mountains takes your breath away. we saw a range of mountains that took our breath away. the tiny airport just lent strength to the magnificence of the mounts. there were no buildings within the entire enclosure of peaks of more than twin peaks. we checked into the hotels and went to shuhe old town. rode a horse-drawn cart and saw another horse piss a lifetime worth of piss right infront of us.

direct translation 1

this one took the cake. it had me laugh my rectum out of my ass. there was another which i cant be bothered to upload.

shuhe old town 1

shuhe old town 2 (fascination)

shuhe old town 3 (scandal+fashion malfunction)

it's abit unclear but cherminahs wearing really ugly socks and has her blouse sticking out of her sweater. i repeat - ugly socks! anw nice was just walking by me and talking. i forgot what he was saying but he was very animated and was waving his hands around. well i accidently caught his hand in this scandalous posture. too coincidental? go figure =)

shuhe old town 4

shuhe old town 5

shuhe old town 6

shuhe old town 7 (running in it)

i tried running here. and it was shit tiring. me and nice ran both days in lijiang and i almost died. nice on the other hand had to slow down for me. baskets x 10.

near dayan old town

mao reaching for the sky

mandhir and mao. so alike?

xidenan

oh yes xidenan! haha when nice saw the signboard he squealed. it reminded us fondly of our resident testicle. it was like a china hang ten. we bought him a shirt here =) and because we came all the way out of the town to buy the shirt, we found a pasar malam! thanks xide!

dayan old town

heheh. the reason i took this pic was cause of the horse's penis. notice also the boy in the bottom right hand corner of the picture is holding a sausage...

direct translation 2

in case you cant read, it says "the fire fight connects you my his happiness the peaceful depending everybody". yeah its good alright. notice the sign of disbelief by (ahem!) on the bottom right of the picture.

that marked the end of the day. whereby nice bought a pistol (gasp!). it was a bb pistol and it was way cool. blue lights and laser guiding all very sweet.

dark dorm

this was our dorm in the village. way dark. there was a single suspending lightbulb which never got electricity running thru it thruout our stay there. the village was not really as village-y as i tot. i was expecting to sleep on soil and stuff. and their clothes were somewhat on par with ours. heh all the clothes we brought for them? rubbished. the toilets however. were appaling. i went in once and died seven times over. the stench pervaded the entire school campus and all. thruout the many days i just pissed in the bushes and shat in densely covered hills.

the shitting adventure was definitely awesome and i am thankful that the toilets sucked. it happened like this...

{scene 1: the decision}[khing, david and kevin are sitting at the stairs outside the school gate, watching the proceedings of the games...]

kevin: i need to shit [kevin runs off]

[kevin returns with a roll of toilet paper hidden under his shirt, in hope no one would see the 8cm bulge in his tummy]

david: mut where you going

kevin: im going to shit

khing: i need to shit oso

david: let's go

{scene 2: the preparation}

[the three walk down the road, away from jing zhuang school for some distance, before they find a densely covered downhill. kevin hands david and khing a handful of toilet paper each.]

david: for the amount that i am about to shit out, this is definitely not enough.

[kevin takes the handful and hands david the whole roll. now kevin and khing starts to descend into the hill while david, ankle sprained, squats behind a huge pile of shit/soil just by the main road. khing and kevin find their respective spots and squat down. all three remove their pants and their underwear.]

kevin: turn around lah khing!

{scene 3: it happened}

david: aye what's happening down there

khing: i started shitting already

david: so fast?

kevin: mine can't come out [david laughs]

khing: my shit is yellow!

kevin: oh sick!

khing: must be the food we've been eating. i think you two oso same colour.

david: shit shit shit got car got car [kevin laughs] [khing laughs]

khing: quick siam!

david: aiyah nehmine la. [kevin laughs]

khing: wah lau ei. i have to hold my penis cuz the grass is tickling it [kevin laughs] [david laughs]

kevin: shut up la i shit halfway make me laugh all go back [khing laughs]

khing: shit shit there's a bee hovering around my testicle

kevin: there's this hole directly under my anus damn scary. later got snake come out bite my ass. [david laughs]

david: there's some croaking sound here...

david: shit shit shit got people got people [kevin laughs][khing laughs]

[khing and kevin finsh their businesses at this point. khing wipes his ass of its burdens and anyhow flings his toilet paper. khing goes over to watch kevin bury his shit. david pauses activity and pulls up his boxers while holding his pants behind his back, trying to act normal as the people walk by.]

kevin: ah good got big rock here [tosses onto shit]

[kevin and khing are done. now they turn to look up at david to see his progress. david, back facing the two, sees that there is no one in sight. he pulls down his boxers, revealing his gleaming ass which brilliance stuns khing and kevin.]

{scene 4: the aftermath}

[khing and kevin ascends the hill AFTER DAVID HAD FINISHED. they notice that the radius of the toilet roll was halved]

[END]

below are some photos nice and i took during our morning run.

village run 1

village run 2

village run 3

village run 4

this part was where there were lots of dogs barking at us and giving little chases. quite scary i shld say.

village run 5

village run 6

en route to the river

the river

here we had a stone skipping contest. which incidentally was of course dominated by yours truly with 5 skips. or was it 4? no matter. some say it was luck, but luck too, is a form of true skill bestowed upon by (ahem!).

oh and there were spermstadpoles too. millions of them. a few guys had the pleasure of dropping some big rock on the entire mass of them. sick.

and now, a breakdown of the village days not covered:

the village days were great. the morning breakfast, which consisted mainly of vase-sized buns, though far from tasty, were simple and just so nice. the kids were great. so enthu, so naive, so together. yet not dumb or stupid in any sense. and not to mention damn fit. perhaps because we're not used to the air but i mean, ac milan was super fit.

the nights that followed were basically concerts. night 1 was something of our concert. a xiang shen between yong wei and mandhir that did not make much sense but doesnt matter becuase that must have been the point, alaistair's three little pigs with me as the impromptu translator which of course worked out well, alaistair's harmonica solo and just tons of singing under the brightly illuminated stars when the lights went out. thereafter followed the bhangra dance. bhangra dances work everywhere la. by the camp fire, no less. then it was time for their naxi dance. haha i managed to catch the dance! met this girl called yan xing. eh she approach me one ah. i didnt mind her, but what happened the day after kinda riled me.

it was in the morning when she came to me to get my details. no harm. so i wrote. then a few other girls, obviously intrigued by this strange yet strangely hot stranger, came for the same purpose. seeing this, she got me to write even more details. the girls waited. then she got me to write page two about myself and it was getting obvious that i had nothing more to write. then the girls left and she said ok that should be enough. but nehmind i can understand.

so came night 2. there were dances and singing, and more dances and singing, both traditional and modern. you would have expected them to be more tribal but there were loads on loads of jay chou, hip hop, s.h.e. and pan wei bo. then it came. she came. she wanted me to dance. i didnt want to. nice and the ppl ard wanted me to dance. i sorta wanted to. the kids behind wanted me to dance. after almost half an hour of persuasion, i obliged. i always wanted to do a liquid dance infront of a crowd, though not unprepared. so i got the music ppl to hit some fast song, and whacked every move i could muster. i think it went quite well, judging from the screams.

from here the kfc (khing's fan club) was formed, further emphasising the fact that my charm knows no boundaries and goes beyond international and even genderial lines. however the kfc is somewhat like a one-man state and was solely dominated by yan xing, who looked the sort who would purge everyone else in the party.

in the end, leaving was still hard. yan xing was crying but i was ignoring her. so mean right. but i guess i'll still write that letter. well as i was saying, leaving was hard. and i think it was quite sad for everyone, us and them alike. it was a great time. just a great time.

:end of village breakdown

side story - the carbines

on the 26th of april, 5:36pm, kevin ng and kenneth khing had just left the guang guang sighseeing hotel in search of necessities such as shampoo, slippers, lip balm and sticky tape to fix kenneth's broken oakley frameless glasses, which cracked. they decided to pay the bb gun shop a visit. they did, only this time, they visited the shop next door. they were taken aback as they rested their eyes upon the biggest bb guns they have ever seen. what really caught their eyes was a carbine. it was stupendously finished and more than that, it was an automatic. with a 40 pellet capacity, it was definitely a mean gun. after plenty plenty pondering, the two decided to purchase the weapon. wrapped suspiciously in newspaper, the two made a dead sprint for the hotel. kenneth carried the package while kevin scouted the area ahead. one could never know how many snipers camped around the area, scousing for weapons dealers such as these two. the two almost made a touchdown, when suddenly the omniscient david appeared behind kenneth with his hand by his side, ready to draw his pistol. kevin, well versed in the dark arts, began to hold off david with his seduction, allowing kenneth to make a mad dash for home. in the end, the two criminals made it. kevin inspected the scope to check the quality of the goods. "aye check this out. damn sex ah". the two decided to take apart the guns so that they could smuggle them back to singapore. but this plan was aborted in the end when the guns malfunctioned and shot both of them in the right testicle. they destroyed the guns in disgust and left china without them.

tiger leaping gorge 1

tiger leaping gorge 2

tiger leaping gorge 3

tiger leaping gorge 4 (david just ran)

tiger leaping gorge 5 (tiger on the right)

tiger leaping gorge 6 (david ignoring both signs)

tiger leaping gorge 7 (mark is thinking... crack!)

the gorge is basically a 2.5km scenic route. it's in and out. so it's a great experience when you go in and out. really cool. i went in and out and so did everyone go in and out. i think we all thoroughly enjoyed ourselves.

not to mention what i think is the quote of the trip by nice. let's see how it came about.

khing [to kevin, referring to the torrent waves]: aye what would happen if one wave came at your face and another came at your back?

[kevin stones]

kevin: one word...

[kevin stones]

kevin: gg

khing: isn't that two?

[kevin stones]

[kevin looks jacked]

[kevin turns to look at the waters]

haha. [stones].

snow mountain 1 (almost looks fake)

ssnow mountain 2 (nice and ice)

snow mountain 3 (the rainbow)

snow mountain 4 (the 3 rainbows)

this shot was taken behind my shades. you cant quite see it but there are 3 rainbows circling the sun. it was damn magnificent.

snow mountain 5 (fastly cable car ride up)

snow mountain 6 (it pees!)

snow mountain 7

snow mountain 8

snow mountain 9

snow mountain 10 (nice not being nice)

this was at the top where there was as much oxygen as there are tigers in the tiger leaping gorge. having weak lungs, i was going face green green. or purple as the tour guide mentioned. we all had to buy cannisters of oxygen. 30 yuan for air! be grateful man.

direct translation 3a

direct translation 3b

chairlift 1

chairlift 2

chairlift 3 (before it)

chairlift 4 (abandoned hat)

it was somewhere here that nice used some cotton buds to dig his ear. damn yellow. he wanted to throw it down but chin and the tour guide were behind. so we looked for a spot where the ppl behind cldnt see what we threw down. when we finally reached the spot, nice cldnt help but scream "bombs away!! whoooooo!!!!!" and threw the measly cotton buds off.

chairlift 5

it happened up the hill again. after we were done with the chairlift, we proceeded to see the other side of the ice mountain. on the way nice and i needed to shit badly. the toilet was closed. the only way to the next toilet was the long chairlift. but hey. there were hills man. nice whipped open his magic school bag and drew out that half used roll of toilet paper. i took a handful and he took the rest. we ran up different hills.

i just kept running upwards for as long as my anus cld hold. it was just not dense enough. ppl cld see me everywhere i go. on the way i had to dodge so manypiles of shits. den i saw this really big log and i did a steeple chase. wah biang eh almost landed in a pile of fresh shit. over the log it was shit shit and more shit. everywhere i turned and everywhere i looked. it was pure shit. whatever shit this is, this human shit of theirs. not only that. there were plenty plenty toilet papers strewn across the whole log. i hit a hot spot. let the shitting begin.

i had no trouble shitting and i met nice at the valley of the two shit hills. apparently he was ambushed by so many ppl he didnt shit cleanly. he was running around with his pants half done and his shit half shat. but the urgency was gone now. we could take the chairlift back.

turqoise river 1

turqoise river 2

on the last night, we strolled back from the restraunt to the hotel. some of the guys just couldnt help themselves. they went into a frenzy and acted like fresh patients from a asylum. they acted like real retards and scared the shit either out or back into passer bys. totally funny. but that marked the end of a wonderful stay in lijiang.

-end of lijiang-

the following day we arrived in kunming. the hotel was fantastic and we watched champs league semis barca and ac milan on tv. ac milan lost. maybe the guy back at jing zhuang cried. i dunno. anw the toilets had 1 yuan condoms. everyone got fascinated. then me, tc, cher and chiam went to the ktv. wah the first look i saw hostessess dressed in hostess outfits. the small room was 660 yuan. so we abandoned that. the following day was some dismayal shopping in kunming. dun go kunming. unless its for the food of course. the final dinner at the hotel was stupendous. cept for the ice cream that had a cigarette stench. or as we called it, hong he ice cream. hong he just happens to be the malboro equivalent in china.

-end of kunming, end of trip-

of course, wherever i go

lame jokes would follow

and many lame jokes were there.

we had bridge to go along

with our merry merry song

and did whatever we could dare

scandals and mountains

old towns aplenty

the culture flowed like fountains

the lessons so many

not bad did we fare

the camera cannot capture

what we above see

the pictures fracture

what has come to be

no stranger to experience

i still safely say

lijiang's brilliance

in my heart forever to stay

nicely done lah